If you're on good terms with your ex's friends then you most likely find comfort in knowing that you can ask about her any time you want.

You can learn exactly what she's doing, who with, and where you ultimately stand during your breakup.

Not only that, but because her friends like you, they'll be rooting for the two of you to get back together.

Now, as good as the above may sound... here's something that probably never crossed your mind: keeping close tabs on your ex through her friends can seriously hurt your chances of winning her back.

Why? Actually there two reasons:

First of all, when you're constantly hearing news about your ex girlfriend (and what she's doing), you'll be getting the version that comes from someone else's perspective.

The information you receive could be misinterpreted before it's passed on to you. This could push you to act in ways you shouldn't while you're trying to win her back.

For example, what if your ex has asked you for space and you're respecting her request. But then, her friends tell you to call her... so you do.

She'll most likely be upset for not taking her seriously and it will cause her to put even more space between the two of you.

And if she's dating someone else, it's even worse. You'll be hearing news about the new guy as well. Even if her friend doesn't mention him you'll be compelled to ask.

Now, keeping in mind that most new relationships start out great... how do you think this will make you feel when you're listening to her friend tell you how happy she is with someone else?

And how do you think this will cause you to react?

Here's the second reason: your focus will be on passing on news to your ex either about how great you're doing (in an attempt to make her think she's missing out on something) or how bad you're doing (in an attempt to make her feel sorry for you).

With the former, she'll see right through it - this will only make her realize that you're trying too hard to impress her. And a woman never wants a guy who tries too hard.

With the latter, she'll be put off - she not going to come to your side just because you're feeling down. It's a sad fact but a fact nonetheless.

As you can see, either way this works against you. Instead of concentrating on getting yourself out of this rut and back to the way you were when she first fell for you, you'll be wasting your efforts to manipulate the situation to your advantage.

So, what's the solution? You either keep her friends at a distance, or if you can't because they're mutual friends, you ask them not to discuss the relationship with you.

As tempting as it may be to learn news of your ex girlfriend... it will only lessen (sometimes severely) your chances of winning her back.


About the Author: George Karanastasis is recognized as one of the leading experts on men's relationship repair and creator of Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back - a book dedicated to helping men with their relationship problems.