Here's one thing that most dating sites won't tell you:

Internet dating is often *a lot* more shallow than real life dating. The exception is when the dating site is a "niche dating site" or a site that creates matches based on psychological profiles.

On a "generic" dating site (especially the free sites), people will often go from the top to bottom of a list and only pick out the pictures they find attractive.

If you don't have a good picture, good luck. In real life, at least you can approach the woman and light up the whole room with your confident body language and exciting personality.

But on the Internet, you profile may not even be read if you do not have a good thumbnail.

Here're the kind of odds you are dealing with...

I did a test a few months ago. I borrowed a picture of an attractive woman (with her permission of course) and set up a simple profile for her.

The profile does not have any special words or phrases.

It's pretty empty except for the picture.

And guess how many messages it received on the first day?

Over 100!

Now tell me...how will a woman screen through all those messages AND search for other people?

By picture thumbnails first, profile second, of course.

Here's what I think:

Hit rates used to be a lot higher seven years ago when there were less members on various dating sites...but now I think the situation gets worse every year as more and more people sign up.

I am not against Internet dating though.

By all means, put up a profile and have fun.

Have a nice picture of you doing something adventurous (like sky-diving or rock-climbing) and then build up the social proof in your profile.

If you are a pilot, put up a picture of yourself in front of a small plane.

This will probably double or triple your response rate.

Yes, it's shallow. But hey! If nobody even clicks on your profile, then you're never going to get a chance to show anyone what a nice and warm person you're inside!

Marius Panzarella is the creator of Dating Secrets Revealed: The Smart Dating System he is recognized as one of the leading web dating coaches and has helped over 60,000 men lead better lives and success with women